Divorce Part 3

8. Order of Protection. If you are truly afraid of your husband or boyfriend you can get an order of protection. Even if there has been physical abuse, you must tell the Judge that you are afraid of him.

Order of protection is a 50-51 and the judge decides and the fact you ARE afraid of him, many times is the deciding factor. If you go before the Judge keep it to the facts of abuse and fear NOT all the details surrounding the main events. For example, it is not about buying a table and chairs. It is about Him raging at you in the car and physically hurting you. Try not to look anywhere but at the Judge. Keep your focus and don’t listen to your spouse if he tries to shake you up. Have your lawyer sit between you and your spouse so you are not next to each other.

9) If your in an abusive/controlling situation, have a bag packed with toothbrush, medications, change of clothes, etc. and store it at a friends house. Preferable a friend your husband doesn’t know. Not a mutual friend. A small notebook with important phone numbers in it. A burner phone, in case you have to leave without your cell phone. If you have someplace with a locker that you can rent like a bus terminal, put it in there. Or maybe store it in the house if you think you can get it out ok but you may not have time to grab it before leaving. Have a purse with an extra set of keys, some cash, maybe a credit card, gum, lipstick, other things you like to have in your purse and leave that with a friend or in your suitcase. If children are still at home, have a suitcase to put one change of clothes in for each child, PJs, toothbrushes/paste, etc.

10. If you are a child of God, a born again Christian, you may have thought you have trusted God before but now you will really learn to trust Him and Not yourself. We often say we are trusting God but we are really trying to help him out or really trusting ourselves. We deceive ourselves. Ask yourself if you are trying to “Set the record straight” by telling everyone your side of the divorce. Anger and Bitterness only eats you up not the other person. Yes it hurts and it will for a long while but it will be less hurtful as we grieve the loss of what could have been and move on. We can not move on if we are stuck in bitterness. Or stuck because we have not allowed ourselves to grieve. Are you living in fear?  Scripture tells us 365 times “Do not be afraid”. One for each day of the year.  Fear is a red flag that we are not “trusting” the Lord.

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